There are churches where getting everything "right" and grimly holding onto the letter of it is the most important thing and just as you think you have grasped the sum total of things you must hold to the goalposts seem to move and more important things are added. Another sort of church is the one that majors on "love" but falsely so called often being a wishy washy thing that sets out not to offend anyone no matter what is at stake. Now I regard doctrine highly but it probably can't be something of which you can grasp the totality. When it comes down to it love is an important part of doctrine. When the Bible talks about love and it being the greatest of, "faith, hope and love," in 1Corinthians 13 we need to look at the meaning of the word "love" used there. You see the Greek language in which Paul's letters are written has three words for "love", "Eros," "Philio" and "Agape" (pronounced Aga-pay) The first is romantic love and the second brotherly love, but Agape is sacrificial love, love that gives even when it hurts. So the wishy washy churches need to have a love that is prepared to upset people if that will bring them nearer to Jesus. What good is agreeing with people if you know they are wrong and in danger? They need to be alerted to their danger not molly coddled into a state of cosiness headed for eternity unprepared. Similarly our brothers who have been majoring in doctrine need to see the application of what they are teaching and they need to look at the doctrine of sacrificial love and live it out to their close colleagues as well as those with whom they don't see eye to eye. What is the point of battering those who don't see what you mean if you are just antagonising them in a way that pushes them further from the truths you have been blessed with. Let them see the application not just the letter A gracious loving brother is more likely to be listened to than someone who is so very sure of his beliefs and shows no humility. How sad to know so many precious truths of the gospel and yet not know the joy that the application brings.
When we lose a loved one it is natural to wonder how they are faring in the next life. I would warn against going to a medium to find out. At worst these people are charlatans after your money, the rest misguided or worse. We are told in the Bible not to try to reach the dead. The best person to call on in this situation is Jesus. That's right, go to the top. He is always available through prayer and doesn't make a charge. All he requires is that you look for him with all your heart. He has the answers to all of life's difficult questions.
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